When it comes to driving parents crazy, some teens are underachievers. If they don't step up their game soon, when it comes time to move out mom may still be capable of coherent conversation. So really guys, you've got to go all out for ape shit crazy.
There are a few main areas where you can really get maximum effect from your efforts.
Stockpile dirty dishes in your bedroom all week. Bring them out and pile them all on the counter around 9pm on a Sunday. Guaranteed your mom will try to load the dishwasher and find out that you ran it with one lonely casserole dish and your lunchbag that smelled like gasoline.
When you run the dishwasher that casserole dish is important - make sure it's the one with the burned on scalloped potatoes. Set the dishwasher to heated dry and transform that burnt on scalloped potato into a new indestructible material previously unknown to man.
Immediately use any new scrubbies on your shoes but leave the old worn out ones alone. Hide her Skrapr in the watering can, she'll never find it there because have you seen those houseplants?
Hoard as much dirty laundry in your room as you can while bitching that you don't have any clean clothes. Bonus points if you bury all the wet towels at the bottom of the pile maximizing the musty smell. Double bonus points if you can score a mysterious spill that dries sticky and stiff. Make her say "Oh. My. God. I think I'm going to vomit" and you get a special star on the Make Your Mom Insane Walk of Fame.
Every article of clothing to leave your body must be inside out. Except the pants, maximize tangling in the washer and dryer with one leg right side out and one inside out. Double bonus if you roll your socks into a ball so they are nice and crunchy come laundry day.
Only half of your laundry hoard comes out Sunday morning. As soon as she's down to only two loads left, insist you have to wash your bedding right now. Empty the dryer into the basket but really jam the laundry down so it will have to be fluffed before folding. Use the longest cycle the wash machine has for your bedding.
Around 8pm on Sunday is when you bring out the other half of your laundry hoard. Moms who start the week well rested and on top of their chores are not nearly as susceptible to going ape shit crazy. That is your goal, so man up and work it like a pro!
Your biggest ally in your efforts is the Front Load Wash Machine. The towels will require special attention to get the musty smell out. Don't even worry about if she's going to turn those socks right side out. She has to or they will come out of the washer as crunchy as when they went in.
The bathroom is a prime zone for crazy making. Shower three times daily - every day. You have to feed that laundry monster you've got growing in your bedroom.
For your morning shower you want to make sure you shit first and then leave it in the toilet. Also you want to time it so that you leave exactly 2 minutes of hot water for the next person. Just long enough for them to shampoo but not long enough to rinse before the cold water hits.
When you shave, put the water on full blast. When you brush your teeth make sure the gob of toothpaste hits the part of the sink the water doesn't reach. Bonus points if you can hack up a loogie too.
Go for maximum splash on the vanity top while scattering all of your toiletries along the entire vanity. Your goal is to make sure each one has to be moved to wipe up your water. You're going for the "Fuck! I don't have time to deal with this" here.
During your afternoon shower blow your nose repeatedly in the shower. Leave at least one booger on the shower wall. Bonus points if it's a dirty one. When you're done there had better not be any hot water for the pre-dinner dishes that you've already lined up.
Work the laundry crazy making in tandem with your bathroom crazy making. Take your bedtime shower as your mom is thinking about doing some more laundry. If you've been following the plan you'll know when, you can hear her muttering to herself.
So for you teens going for the gold standard of crazy parents, follow my plan and you should have your mom drinking booze right out of the bottle in no time.